How to build resilience to shame
It is no exaggeration to say that shame is a very painful emotion. Shame is often confused with guilt, but the two emotions are not the same. Guilt is usually associated with the feeling of remorse over something we’ve done or not done. Shame is different. Shame comes from a feeling or belief that we are flawed and unworthy of love and belonging.
Why shame matters
Shame is a powerful, intensely personal emotion that affects our wellbeing and mental health. Shame is not benign. It can lead to social isolation and withdrawal. Brené Brown, a leading researcher on shame, explains its role has been examined in:
“A wide range of mental and public health issues including self-esteem/concept issues, depression, addiction, eating disorders, bullying, suicide, family violence, and sexual assault” (Brown, 2006).
The link between shame and addiction
Feelings of deep shame are often linked to depression and can be associated with addiction as well. When we feel depressed, sometimes we reach for substances in order to self-medicate. Alcohol and/or drugs can temporarily change how we feel, and this is one way some choose to manage difficult emotions.
Using alcohol and/or drugs to self-medicate often leads to the experience of more shame. This can create a vicious cycle that is hard to break out of.
If you are struggling with shame, it is possible to build resilience to shame. When we build resilience, we can withstand the effects of this powerful emotion and create a situation that has the potential for healing.
Building resilience to shame
Shame is felt by all of us at some point in our lives. There is no way to avoid shame; however, we can build resilience. According to Brené Brown, shame resilience is the ability to recognize shame when it happens and then take steps to move through it in a constructive way. When we do this, we are able to maintain our authenticity and continue to grow from our experiences.
It is possible to heal both addiction and shame. Working with a therapist can help you recognize and process your feelings of shame. From there, you can begin to build a healthy life and a constructive way of dealing with your feelings. When you take a proactive and positive approach, you can move forward on your recovery from addiction or problem substance use.
Therapy in Boca Raton
Are you looking for therapy for dissociative disorder, trauma, or anxiety? Lionhearted Counseling provides trauma-focused therapy in Boca Raton, Florida. Contact us today by calling or filling out the contact form and clicking send.
